Fantasies
by If only you loved me
Summary: *these need to stop i need to stop thinking like this.* *hik? why don't you say you love me?*


yaoi yaoi yaoi!! .

I pushed my little brother back into a chair, "spread your lags kao." h-i-k-ka--" he tried to shudder out before interrupted by me unzipping his pants. He squirmed to try and tried to fight it, "relax, my brother, I no you want this look your even harder then me." I pushed my head in between his lags...

"Hikaru? Hikaru!" and just like that an other wonderful fantastic was ruined destroyed. "Hikaru!?" I looked up at my moms face then snapped, "What?" "are you ready to go yet? "NO! I need to find kaoru!"

running off trying my best to hid the bola in my pants. These little "fantasies" have been happing scene I was13. Once kaoru was blowing on a peace of chicken in the kitchen I just walk around the corner and there he was with his lips puckered wind slowly cooling the meat. It hit my all at once him puckering his lips at me then our soft lips would meet, and I would slowly lick his lip then gently slid my tong in to meet his...

I need to stop this it's not helping me to get "this" to go away before I can see kaoru.

I open the door to our room to find kaoru siting there on our bed with a popcical hanging out of his mouth, him moving it in and out slowly, I flinched an rushed forward pining kaoru to our bed the popcical fell on the bedspread. I striped kaoru to nothing in a matter of seconds. I rolled him over, Kaoru new what I wanted him to do he got to his hands and knees. I reacher for the Popsicle kaoru whimpered knowing damn straight what I was going to do with it. then Taping kaorus entry with the cold treat I manged to make him moaned again louder, sweeter, sexier. "...hikaru..." he whispered.

"Hikaru? Are you ready to go yet?" I grabbed a jacket off the back of a chair and covered the front of me with it. 'this can't go on what if one day I really do just exploded on him and... no no no no. I have to ignore this feeling its not safe to let it out, kaoru might get hurt.

_Dam. I thought I had him for sure this time. Hikaru why don't you just give in. I know what you want to do it so just do it already. Or should I say do me already. Hikaru I love you more then anything else._

I remember back one Christmas when when kaoru got a sword, I have never been so embarrassed I my life, Kaoru said as he unsheathed the sword ' wow its so long. I can't wait to play with it. But then again I like short ones better.' of course he was talking about the sword. But still he was just so cute the way he said it. I turned away, 'I need to go to the bathroom.' and that was the start of it all, when we where just 13.

_I love the way he looks at me I just love it. But I never wanted to believe that ever. I thought that if I told him my feeling he would hate me. So I wanted to test it you see how he felt. I guess I could stop and tell him how I feel but some how I feel like he should tell me you know? So I'm going to wait tell he says it. But I hope its soon I'm running out of things to do here._

"_come on kaoru lets go to the mall now. Mom wants us to turn in those papers now.." _

I stair at him, he bits the Popsicle off the stick. "ya OK..." he says through a mouth full of frozen juice.

Me and kaoru had to turn in our moms fashion designs to some old lady ,that hates us, what a boring day the only good thing is I got to spend it with kaoru. But of course when we where walk kaoru just had to get a drink from the water fountain. There must be something wrong with me, cause I almost did kaoru right then and there...kaoru puckered his lips and lean in to get a drink. Oh how cute he looked to. It made me want to kiss him, shove him up against the fount and just...

ahhhh thats so wrong, I'm such a pervert. I slammed my fist in to the shower wall sending soap bottles to the ground. 'knock knock' "hikaru are you OK?" kaoru said opening the door. "ya I'm fine I just drooped the shampoo total." "oh, OK good. Do you mined I have to go pea?" he walked over to the toilet. It took everything I had not to peak through the curtains at his beautiful slim body. Not that I would know or anything I mean can you blame me for pretending to be asleep so I could watch him change. Until I did that I though we were the same be we're not his fetchers are smaller smother and I just love it...no no no no I don't don't... but I do so much. I dug my nails across my chest to avoided lunging at kaoru, drawing blood. Kaoru... I...need you.

_So your not going to look hikaru? Well then how about this. I stepped back and "slipped" on the bathroom rug. "whao whao hik-" thoued I leaned on something soft and wet. "kaoru kaoru! Are you OK?! Answers me kaoru!" "hika I'm fine." (by the way remember hikaru is naked and kaoru was going to the bathroom so well his...is kind still hang out.) hikaru stared to blush just as bad as I was. We both snapped up and turn a way. "Well I should go." I said get up and zipping my pants closing the door behind me leaving hikaru on the floor. "...hikaru I love you..." I whispered under my breath._

Kaoru its all over there nothing more I can do tomorrow I'm making plans to leave sorry kaoru but if this go on I will end up destroying us. one day I'll snap and...no I'm going to leaven you before that happens_._ I'm going to take grandmas offer to take over the hot springs. I'm sorry kao...

ok im done with ch 1 please review i no this wasnt the best thing you wrote but it will get better.


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